This topic was suggested to me by a friend who is currently working with teenagers. Now I will concede that original audience is off my normal teaching radar by about ten years, but I think the issue should span every age range.
Here's the story...
As part of an assignment the students were asked to write down a list of ten interests. Some boys in the class chose to use this opportunity to tease another student by commenting that his first five interests should be being gay. The TEACHER then proceeded to laugh and say "number one could say guys, two could say guys, three could say guys...".
This serves as an extreme example of something that I'm sure happens far too often. What happens when it isn't only the children that require the emotional education? How do we, as teachers, deal with these kinds of situations when we see them happening? We might consider it our job to step in when it comes to students, but what about the adults around us? Not all situations are this clear cut, where I would probably just say go to a supervisor. But whether we like it or not, as teachers, our opinions will find their ways into our classrooms. And like it or not, the opinions of all the teachers around us won't always match our own. Often times teachers can sound as ignorant as the students they are meant to be mentoring.
Through my own journey from student to teacher I hate to say that I've all too often felt small pieces of my soul lost in similar moments of helplessness. It's not our place, not our class, not our student, not our problem. I could probably go on for hours about how far this problem can stretch. Love is a battlefield and so is teaching. For every child we fight to teach emotional awareness, there are a thousand factors working against us, and to find those oppositional forces on what we thought was our own side can be heartbreaking. I have no solution, I don't believe anyone does. Just faith to fight the good fight. By promoting emotional education we can only hope that we are in some small way preventing our students from someday causing the heartbreak.
Teach on
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
The Double Edged Sword
Welcome new year!
So instead of waiting for lesson inspiration to strike, I thought it'd be better to just let inspiration strike where it may. This mainly means more of my meandering thoughts on teaching. Lucky you!
Today I was thinking of the double edged sword. I have a student; a boy who, despite his often sweet thoughts and good intentions, finds himself on the wrong end of a bad decision pretty much daily. Most of the time these decisions lead to fights with other students. During one of these fights yesterday this boy came to me. I'm sorry to say now that I can't even remember the complaint he made to me, so quickly did I brush it away with a stock response for minor offenses. But today it bothered me. Don't I tell this child, and others like him, everyday that if there's a problem he can't solve he should ask a teacher for help? I'd be willing to bet my collection of teaching stickers that most teachers ask this of their students on a daily basis. And yet, we then walk the thin line between a student that asks for help...and the dreaded tattletale. In fact we can become so annoyed with the tattletales in our class that we begin to dismiss children who come to us in good intent. Yesterday this boy came to me and instead of saying "Thank you, I'm glad you told me, let's work it out together." I made some wonderful contribution like "Alright, tell so and so to give it back."
How do we keep from getting here? Beyond teaching children how to handle their own conflicts, how can we encourage children to come to us for help without getting burned out? How do I continue to recognize that however small the problem seems to me, it was brought to my attention because it feels big to my student?
Thoughts? Suggestions? Personal musings? Share with me!
So instead of waiting for lesson inspiration to strike, I thought it'd be better to just let inspiration strike where it may. This mainly means more of my meandering thoughts on teaching. Lucky you!
Today I was thinking of the double edged sword. I have a student; a boy who, despite his often sweet thoughts and good intentions, finds himself on the wrong end of a bad decision pretty much daily. Most of the time these decisions lead to fights with other students. During one of these fights yesterday this boy came to me. I'm sorry to say now that I can't even remember the complaint he made to me, so quickly did I brush it away with a stock response for minor offenses. But today it bothered me. Don't I tell this child, and others like him, everyday that if there's a problem he can't solve he should ask a teacher for help? I'd be willing to bet my collection of teaching stickers that most teachers ask this of their students on a daily basis. And yet, we then walk the thin line between a student that asks for help...and the dreaded tattletale. In fact we can become so annoyed with the tattletales in our class that we begin to dismiss children who come to us in good intent. Yesterday this boy came to me and instead of saying "Thank you, I'm glad you told me, let's work it out together." I made some wonderful contribution like "Alright, tell so and so to give it back."
How do we keep from getting here? Beyond teaching children how to handle their own conflicts, how can we encourage children to come to us for help without getting burned out? How do I continue to recognize that however small the problem seems to me, it was brought to my attention because it feels big to my student?
Thoughts? Suggestions? Personal musings? Share with me!
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
When the Lessons are for You
So today was one of "those" days. You know, when it seems like you're down to the very last drop of your patience. When every noise sets you on edge. When each toy left on the floor seems like a personal vendetta that you and only you can avenge. These kinds of days always seem to be both a nightmare and a blessing for me. Just when I think I can't take it for another second, and the smoke from my temperamental Vesuvius starts to fume... my teacher karma sets in.
Case and point: Due to a short field trip to our local library my class is running about fifteen minutes behind schedule. Because of this, lunch time seems to be a whirlwind of chaos as we try to get everyone served and fed in as little time as possible. The children are serving themselves at the normal glacial speed that four year olds only seem to adopt for things that you need done quickly. In my haste I announce that I will be pouring their drinks and begin to fill their glasses. Of course I'm thinking 'I'm on top of things now, I'm the in control adult'. And thats about the time I notice that I have poured almost an entire pitcher of water onto the head of the student sitting beneath me.
Yes, I am the in control adult.
And right there, right in that moment when I think maybe I have really lost it for the day.... this little boy puts his hands on his hips, looks at his friends at the table and declares "Well I think I'm getting a shower!" And we laugh. I mean really laugh.
Teacher karma... I say so often is probably the best saving grace of this job. I honestly believe teaching is one of the few jobs on this planet where you can be having the worst day and in a single act/word/ look from a child suddenly be thinking "this is the best job ever". The moment where a child says "I love you" for no reason, or you hear them humming a song to themselves that you taught them, or they sense your grouchy mood and tell you 5 minutes worth of completely nonsensical knock knock jokes, or they walk up with that piece of artwork they've been slaving over for the last 20 minutes and announce that it was made for you. What other job has these moments? Teacher karma...sometimes the lessons are for you. Take a deep breath. It's not the end of the world. Stop taking things so seriously.
Patience is supposed to be the teachers superpower, but everybody has a day of kryptonite. I'm always curious how other teachers deal when their emotions get the better of them. Parents and teachers alike, if you have any suggestions or stories I'd love to hear!!
Until then I'll just keep humming my old Follies backup "It's like I'm losing my mind" and remember that karma never sends us storms without a little sunshine after.
Teach on!
Case and point: Due to a short field trip to our local library my class is running about fifteen minutes behind schedule. Because of this, lunch time seems to be a whirlwind of chaos as we try to get everyone served and fed in as little time as possible. The children are serving themselves at the normal glacial speed that four year olds only seem to adopt for things that you need done quickly. In my haste I announce that I will be pouring their drinks and begin to fill their glasses. Of course I'm thinking 'I'm on top of things now, I'm the in control adult'. And thats about the time I notice that I have poured almost an entire pitcher of water onto the head of the student sitting beneath me.
Yes, I am the in control adult.
And right there, right in that moment when I think maybe I have really lost it for the day.... this little boy puts his hands on his hips, looks at his friends at the table and declares "Well I think I'm getting a shower!" And we laugh. I mean really laugh.
Teacher karma... I say so often is probably the best saving grace of this job. I honestly believe teaching is one of the few jobs on this planet where you can be having the worst day and in a single act/word/ look from a child suddenly be thinking "this is the best job ever". The moment where a child says "I love you" for no reason, or you hear them humming a song to themselves that you taught them, or they sense your grouchy mood and tell you 5 minutes worth of completely nonsensical knock knock jokes, or they walk up with that piece of artwork they've been slaving over for the last 20 minutes and announce that it was made for you. What other job has these moments? Teacher karma...sometimes the lessons are for you. Take a deep breath. It's not the end of the world. Stop taking things so seriously.
Patience is supposed to be the teachers superpower, but everybody has a day of kryptonite. I'm always curious how other teachers deal when their emotions get the better of them. Parents and teachers alike, if you have any suggestions or stories I'd love to hear!!
Until then I'll just keep humming my old Follies backup "It's like I'm losing my mind" and remember that karma never sends us storms without a little sunshine after.
Teach on!
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